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‘Personal Validation’ Alone Is a Powerful Concept: But What If You Factored in the Power of the ‘Law of Attraction’ When Leaving Everyone You Meet With a Smile Or Blessing? Wow!

January 19, 2009 by  
Filed under Anne Holmes, Blog, Relationships & Family

 Can You Harness Power of Validation?

About six weeks ago, as we moved into the year-end holiday season, I told you about my intent to personally take note of everyone I encountered, on a daily basis for at least 30 days. My plan was to make sure that I recognized everyone, but more powerfully, I wanted find some way to compliment each and every person in a unique and personal way.

In personal development terms, this act I was taking on is called, “Validation,” which is defined by the self improvement gurus as “an observable act and human behavior that espouses both appreciation and gratitude.”

However you want to define it, my decision was largely inspired by watching the short movie, “Validation,” which is freely available on YouTube, and, with over 426,000 views since it was uploaded, has acquired a bit of a following…

Here Are My Personal – Albeit Unscientific – Results:

During this time period, I had a lot of fun, and exercised my creativity:

  • I didn’t just offer individualized (or personalized) recognition and validation to friends and family members
  • I also offered validation to total strangers I met on my daily journey
  • I didn’t just make eye contact with everyone I encountered, while greeting them with a generic “Good morning,” or “Hello”
  • I actually made a point to personally engage each person I met in conversation, offering some sort of individualized and personal feedback; with the goal to leaving them smiling and in a more positive mood than when I’d met them.
  • Sort of like Clint Eastwood, in the movie “Dirty Harry,” I actually tried to “make their day” – (but In a very uplifting way!)

The particular attempt at validation varied, depending on the person and the situation.

  • It might have been as simple as a genuine compliment about something they had done, the impact they were having on the people around them, or the attractiveness of something they were wearing
  • On other occasions, it was a personal inquiry that showed I remembered something about them from a conversation we’d had the last time we’d met
  • And in the case of total strangers, it was a personalized comment based on my appreciation of the situation at that moment. You know, something a lot more personal than, “So do you think it’s going to snow today?”

Doubtless I will never see some of those people again. But it was still empowering to take note of their presence, and leave them with a warm feeling in their hearts.

To review a few of the dozens of people I had the opportunity to positively interact with, so you understand the scope of my actions:

  • A couple who held the door for me as I entered a store
  • Checkers and cashiers at gas stations, restaurants, grocery stores, pharmacies and shops
  • Waiters, and restaurant owners, with whom I might previously have exchanged general chit-chat
  • A handful of postal workers, who I see at the window and make idle conversation with on a regular basis, as well as fellow USPS customers, none of whom I’d met before
  • Of particular note were a couple of fellow customers at a gas station: one,  who saw me attempting to open my car’s hood, so I could add windshield wiper fluid to my car. One came over to offer to assistance with the latch; another stepped in to offer to pour in the fluid… Both were total strangers who doubtless didn’t know each other, and who may never be in the same place at the same time again…

They All Felt Appreciated – And I Felt Great, Too!

That’s one of the key “take aways” about validation – which you would probably best define as “a specific acknowledgment of appreciation for a task well done:” It is even more powerful for the fact that it feels just as good to the person who does the validating as it does to the person who gets validated.

But the unintended outcome was that I was amazed at how many people reciprocated my greeting by going out of their way to help me, even though I am a fully capable adult, and wasn’t seeking or soliciting any sort of assistance!

This was a total surprise which I didn’t fully comprehend until I happened to pick up and read a quick little book called Using the Law of Attraction to Get Anything You Want,” by Shawn Casey and Antonio Thornton.

You See, By My Actions, I’d Unwittingly Called The Law of Attraction Into Play…

You’re probably familiar with the concept of the Law of Attraction. Most people who’ve learned about it define it as a Universal Principal – like the Law of Gravity – that  works every time, whether you choose to use it for your benefit or not. In other words:

  • Like attracts like
  • Thoughts become things
  • In life, you will always get what you are expecting to get, because that’s what you call into action

If you haven’t seen the Validation movie yet, you should. It’s both powerful and uplifting, though a number of people also report that it makes them cry, so be warned. At a bit over 16 minutes, making the decision to watch may daunt you, of course.  But you’ll find it is thought-provoking and well worth your time…

And if you’d like to learn more about how you can use both Validation and the Law of Attraction in your day-to-day life, grab the book, too. It’s a very worthwhile, quick read.

Among many other points made in the book, Shawn Casey tells of an organized personal greeting effort – similar to mine – which has been growing, worldwide. Started in Florida, this movement is called “Hello From My Heart Day.”

Seems that by invoking the Law of Attraction, and consciously choosing to validate, or genuinely greet people, you can actually participate in a growing movement that has reduced violent crime by as much as 33% according to statistics cited in the book.

Who Knew There Was That Much Value to Personal Validation?

  • Grab the book, “Using the Law of Attraction to Get Anything You Want,” learn how you can use the Law of Attraction to get anything you want – and discover how you can help reduce violent crime in our world.
  • What a deal! Especially since the book is only a measly seven bucks!
  • What’s that equate to? For the price of a fast food meal, you can get on the road to improving your life, and help make the world a better, safer place for all of us!
  • That’s gotta be what they call a “no brainer,” right?

Read the Book and Prepare to Have Your Life Changed.

And after you’ve digested it, feel free to send me a note telling me how it impacted You!

Thanksgiving Note: Call it Praise, Validation or Affirmation, Have You Ever Tried Consistently Greeting Everyone You Meet With a Genuine Message of Appreciation?

November 27, 2008 by  
Filed under Anne Holmes, Blog, Spirit & Faith

Thanksgiving: Validating Abundance

“When you are grateful, fear disappears and abundance appears” ~ Tony Robbins

It’s Almost Thanksgiving Day Here in the US, So It Seems Appropriate to Start By Thanking You For Being a Regular Reader of This Blog…

Besides being grateful for you, and offering you our thanks, we also say “Happy Thanksgiving” – which probably means more if you’re reading this post in the United States. If you live elsewhere, our thanks for your support are still genuine, of course, even if it’s not your “official” day for giving thanks!

We’re truly appreciative that so many of you have discovered and shared our BoomerLifestyle blog in the past few months – and clearly enjoy reading it. More than that, thanks to all of you for your participation, including the many comments you post. We love hearing from you!

By the Way, Speaking of Being Grateful, Have You Ever Noticed How Persistent God – or the Universe – Can Be?

Have you ever ignored or – just plain failed to recognize – a message sent to you…  Yet the message keeps coming at you – in different guises or from different sources – until you just have to pay attention?

Then, when you finally GET the message, you feel like you ought to knock yourself on the head, a la Homer Simpson? (“Doh!”)

Well, That Happened to Me Recently.

In the space of two days, the same message came to me from at least three different sources. But it wasn’t until the third message that I finally got the hint… When I did, the message was so timely and powerful, I just had to share it with you.

Actually the message is in the form of a sixteen-minute video. In fact, the length of the video is why I ignored it so long… Hopefully you won’t make the same mistake!

  • First, my RSS feed notified me that my friend Ken McArthur had posted a new message on his fantastic Impact Factor blog. I opened it up, but didn’t read it right away, as the headline indicated I’d need to be watching a video for 16 minutes and 23 seconds. Sadly, I felt I didn’t have that amount of time available just then. “Catch it later,” I thought, as I filed the message in my reading folder. (Ken’s stuff is always too good to delete!)
  • The  second tap on my shoulder came next day, when another good friend, John Cussons, picked up on  Ken’s post and wrote about the “The Validation Movie,” in his blog, IMovator in Internet Marketing. Well, I’d just talked to John for about an hour the night before; so, pleading press of work, I mentally said, “Thanks, John, I’ll have to catch this later,” and once more filed the post without viewing it…
  • The Universe finally got through to me yesterday morning, when a third friend, Carrie Tucker, sent me an email, mentioning how impactful she’d found John’s post, and advising me to take a look if I hadn’t already. “OK, OK. Thanks, Carrie.”  
  • The thing is,  Carrie’s an extremely busy woman, so a nagging little thought took root in my brain: “If Carrie thinks this post is so worthy of immediate attention that she’s sent me a personal email… Hmmm. Maybe I ought to clear the decks and watch it.” So I did.

 Bingo!

Here’s the video my three friends – and the Universe – were trying to send me. Please do take the time to watch it; it’s my Thanksgiving gift to you. Ken and John say it might make you cry. I don’t know about that. But I do know it will make you think, make you smile, and it just might change your life:

“Validation” Is Truly Validating 

Give this short movie a chance, and you’ll see that it is about more than “a fable about a guy who spends his life validating parking tickets.” It’s actually an inspirational story about the life-changing value of: 

  • Always looking for the good in people and situations, and showcasing the impact that has on the people you meet every day
  • Smiling at the world and giving off positive energy – which is huge, when you take the teachings of the Law of Attraction into consideration
  • Persistence in the face of thwarted love
  • Acting with abundance and living without fear

Since watching the movie, I’ve realized that the main character, Hugh Newman, is played by an actor named TJ Thyne, who’s appeared in several movies and dozens of current-day TV shows, including CSI, CSI: New York, Boston Legal, Nip/Tuck, Bones and NCIS. You’ll probably recognize him. Actually, he and his production company, Theatre Junkies, produced the movie, which has rightfully won over 20 awards at various film festivals. 

Clearly this is no fly-by-night, quickie homemade video; it’s a work of art.

It has what those in the film marketing business call good production values.  In fact, you’ll probably agree that it’s truly a message from the Universe, created for the benefit of all humankind.

So Here’s Your Charge: Enjoy the Video – And Take a Lesson From It!

That’s right: Give some thought to offering praise, appreciation, validation, kudos or compliments – whatever you want to call it – to everyone you meet for at least a month. (Hopefully by then this will become a habit.)

Just think what far-reaching impact that might have on our world.

And, in the process, just think of all the positive energy and abundance you’ll be creating merely by pausing a moment, to notice and give thanks for the small things – and the big ones – that come your way?

Appreciating everyone is actually pretty easy to do, once you put your mind to it:

For example, at Wal-Mart yesterday, my frustrated checker was attempting to cajole her balky hand-scanner into processing my case of caffeine-free Diet Pepsi. I’d already courteously left it in the cart so she wouldn’t have to haul it. (Grocery store cashiers get a daily workout just moving all those cases of beer, soda pop – and now, huge frozen Thanksgiving turkeys, off the counters and into our shopping carts.) 

Finally, she groaned as she hauled my case of soda up onto the conveyor, resorting to the belt-based scanner. As she did, she moaned about how sore this job makes her muscles at the end of the day.

Cognizant of my new goal to spread positive vibes everywhere I go, I happily acknowledged my recognition of the amazing and efficient job she and all the other checkers do as they process all us shoppers’ purchases.  And I followed that by pointing out how lucky she is, since the “free workout” her job offers her means she has no need to spend money on a gym membership!

She actually chuckled appreciatively and flexed her biceps!

What an easy way to brighten her day.

Really, it’s such a small thing to pause to say “thank you” to people you meet during the day and acknowledge them. Yet you’ll find your results are big. Not to mention that you’ll feel better, too!

Not Sure How Challenging it Might Be to Start Giving Thanks and Boosting Attitudes on a Daily Basis?

Even the most dedicated curmudgeon can learn to change her stripes and become consciously appreciative. I speak from personal experience. Sadly, there was a time in my life – somewhere in the early teens as I recall – when I actually taught myself to think negatively, because I loved the attention I received whenever I voiced cynical, jaded thoughts. Yikes! What is it about our society that would affirm that sort of negative behavior?

Thankfully I have reformed to the point where, a few years ago, one of my business associates labeled me “the most disgustingly positive person” he knew.  “Tell Anne the worst news,” he opined, “and she can find something good about it!” Woo Hoo! I’m delighted with that verdict!

Need some help learning how to turn your mental energies to the positive side?

My friend Scott Armstrong, one of America’s top success coaches, can help you. Recently he and his partner, Dr. Patricia A. Ross, PhD., created a fantastic book, Best Affirmations Workbook,” which is actually a 30-day “how-to” guide to actively creating the life you want through the active use of affirmations. It’s available as a PDF download as well as in audio format, which makes it really easy for you to use. I highly recommend it.  

In addition, they have created 21 sets of affirmations on crucial topics, such as:

  • Relationships
  • Parenting
  • Weight management and exercise
  • Self confidence
  • Mindset
  • Manifesting miracles
  • Health and wellness
  • Taking quantum leaps in achieving your personal goals

Best of all, with an eye toward helping you recession-proof your mind, they’re currently offering a special right now: You can “test-drive” the workbook for free. Or benefit from their monthly special offer.  

Hey – What have you got to lose? Nothing but those negative thoughts that are dragging you down, right?